Review: Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Mindy Kaling
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Mindy Kaling has convinced me to be her best friend.

I'm ashamed to admit that back in the day when the (American) television show The Office was at its height and I called myself a fan, I was also completely unaware that Kaling had any claim to the show other than her character Kelly Kapoor. I know, I know, I'm a bit of a space-cadet sometimes and apparently failed to notice her name in the writing and producing credits the countless times that it appeared. When her new show The Mindy Project came out I decided to give it a try, having by now realized her contributions to The Office, and assumed it'd be equally gut-bustingly hilarious and witty. Alas, I was both disappointed and let down. Maybe I didn't watch enough episodes to really get into it, maybe I just didn't 'get' what the show was trying to do; either way, it was not Mindy's and my time. So Mindy and I took a break - we just 'weren't that into each other.'

Now all of that has changed. Reading Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?... is like reading my diary from high school. In fact the title of the book itself sums up my entire high school experience. I am more than sure that I said those exact words at least once between the ages of 14 and 18. Mindy gets it. She gets what it's like to be 16, 21, 25, and still feel like everyone is hanging out without you. But instead of playing the victim card, Mindy tells us that it's okay to be the odd one in a sea of conformists, to be the quiet one, the shy one:

"I just want ambitious teenagers to know it is totally fine to be quiet, observant kids. Besides being a delight to your parents, you will find you have plenty of time later to catch up."

MAN if I had had someone to tell me this when I was a teenager! Well to be honest I probably wouldn't have listened to them anyway being a teenager and all, but still! It's the sentiment that counts! It's kind of funny (or sad) that now, after almost 10 years since I graduated, I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that high school sucked and that is a-okay! I have noticed a bit of a trend in memoirs released by female comedians (Amy Poehler and Tina Fey to name two of my favs) in which they recount embarrassing, awkward, and yet totally relatable stories from their teenage selves. They're the kind of stories that make you laugh out loud and exclaim "that's so true!" and suddenly you don't feel so weird/crazy/alone. Mindy's own tales had me giggling and rolling my eyes as I remembered just how important high school and high school related events seemed to us all at the time, as if we were all living a version of the famous song "Jack & Diane":

"Are you kidding me? The thrill of living was high school? Come on, Mr. Cougar Mellencamp. Get a life."

Ooh Mindy, preach it girl.

The book is divided up into a number of bigger sections and then again into a bunch of smaller, cuter, sections. This worked out fine for me once I got used to it as I just didn't expect there to be so many mini-essays among the essays. At first I found the flow to be a bit jarring - we'll be reading about her fondness for Irish goodbyes one minute and then jump into a chapter about how "hooking up is confusing" the next, so yes it's a bit all over the place which did bring my own rating down a bit.

Despite the over-all jumpiness of the book, the hilarious essays often made up for it, some notable ones being "I Forget Nothing: A Sensitive Kid Looks Back," and "I Love New York And It Likes Me Okay," and "Hollywood: My Good Friend Who Is Also A Little Embarrassing." Those titles alone have some pretty amazing potential for a stand-alone.
I particularly enjoyed "Types of Women in Romantic Comedies Who Are Not Real" and "Non-Traumatic Things That Have Made Me Cry" (this last one had me fist-pumping in agreement like crazy, especially over our shared love for the A Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack...the tears are real people!).

Basically, I could go on and on but I have definitely already over-stayed my welcome on this one. You get it. This book is funny.

My fan-girlish and favourable review aside, I'm only giving this book 3.5 stars. Out of the whole thing, I really only loved a handful of the essays, while the rest of them fell a little flat and felt a bit forced, like she was just filling in pages with random thoughts (hilarious yes, but random).

View all my reviews